I think I want to write about something sexy this time. It's all been so damn emotional. I need something lighter, freer.
Interrupted streams of consciousness, lists, and scattered thoughts over the week….
What’s it like when you taste someone’s lips for the first time? When you go beyond acknowledging an attraction and engage in it, explore it? Open yourself to the whole of it. Discovering the rhythm of their kiss of the pressure of their touch. The way their skin feels under your fingers. The richness of the sensory experience. How a kiss on the neck can actually be something that stimulates all five senses. The taste of skin, the sound of breath in your ear, the feel of her pulse under your lips or tongue, the close view of the curve of her clavicle, and aroma of her pores opening to the heat you create together.
It’s like time stops and love energy prevails in what feels like a slice of eternity.
The sweetness of longing that can only really come when she’s away. Realizing that you actually need to miss someone. There is a certain pleasure in the moment you get to see each other when you have to find the time, make the effort, or it’s just been a while. Sensory memory, physical memory, the uniqueness of their touch and how the feel under your fingers all comes rushing back. Familiar and new at the same time. Savor these moments, make it possible for them to exist.
Selfies while I smoke
Moments of longing pushed through paint or word or strum
Waking up at 5 a.m. with something on my mind and trying to find a method of expression
I’ve learned I like my space. I like me and being with just me and my thoughts even more than I thought I did. I have many times been accused of not knowing how to be alone, or even being afraid of being alone. I’m sure there has been some truth to that. I guess that’s where intention comes in. I had been doing that. Being intentional about the time I spend with myself. I got away from it for a while. It’s time to get back!!!
I speak MY mind. I live MY life.
I say it because I want to. I do it because I am inspired to. I give it because it feels good to me. I live a very self-serving life. There are few things I do that do not benefit me in some way. The basic criteria: does it feel good and do you want to do it? If it fits these, there’s a good chance it will happen. Now, if it doesn’t, the chances of it happening are super slim. Written out, these words seem so greedy and narcissistic, but I know that’s not the whole picture.
David….. You are kind and loving. Your love and energy are boundless. It is just your time and attention you need to work on managing. You love your life, but there are loads of things you’d like to change, too.
Shit, I have to remind myself regularly!!!
Love them as they are, have amazing sex, and communicate with intention.