We all have expectations and to be honest, they all need to be managed. It took me some time to realize this. I still struggle with it. There are mornings (like today) where I wake up filled with a desire to share something. Sometimes, that ‘something’ can be as simple as a thought that filled my head. Other times, that ‘something’ can be as strong as waking from an intense dream that leaves me with the desire to call the other person in the dream. I often stop myself ‘cause I know better, only to text them later anyway. (Like I said, I struggle!)
In my head somewhere, there is an expectation. A response I'm hoping for. I don't actually have a clear image of that expectation. In fact, it's pretty abstract actually, but it is clear as day when I get something other than it.
Instantly, what started as a beautiful waking moment becomes a distracting disappointment that now has me writing this new post rather than working on the other things on my agenda for the day. I guess all of this is really just to say that our expectations whether they are clear to us or not, have the power to disappoint us.
I wouldn't be foolish enough to open my mouth to say something like, "Let go of all your expectations and you will never experience disappointment!" Yes, this might very well be true but come on! We all know that ain't happening.
What I can say is this: Work at adjusting your expectations. Do your best not to set yourself up for a let-down by creating situations where you know the most likely outcome will disappoint you. Prime example: Don't text your ex at the beginning of your day ready to share about a wonderfully tantalizing dream you had, thinking she actually wants to hear about it. Just keep that damn enjoyment to yourself and keep it moving!
Now, you will slip up. You will share things you shouldn’t. If you’re anything like me, you will share too damn much and have people looking at you sideways like, "Why the hell are you telling me this?" (Not a good feeling. Not at all.) Listen to that little voice in your head that asks you, “Are you sure you really want to share this information or commit this act?”
Know this: Some disappointment is unavoidable. Take it with a grain of salt. Try not to let it piss on your parade.
With that said, there are some situations for which this entire page of "advice" needs to be thrown out the window. There are moments that must be experienced and truths that must be told despite the expectations or how disappointed you may end up after the fact. By now, you should know me well enough to know that we’ll get into that discussion in a later post. For the moment, just remind yourself:
Love them as they are, have amazing sex and communicate with intention.