You guessed it. This one is about Tinder. In case you are not familiar, Tinder is a mobile application for dating. The way it works is pretty simple. You download the application, upload up to six pictures and say a little something about yourself and/or what you're looking for. You can decide whether or not to connect various social media platforms to your Tinder profile.
In its simplest form, Tinder is designed to elicit a visual response from its users. You have the ability to like (swipe right) or dislike (swipe left) anyone at first sight. Not everyone posts the allotted six pictures. Some people's pictures suck and others seem to know just how to make themselves shine. As a trained photographer, it can be easy for me to see when all of a person’s pics are designed to highlight one thing or disguise another. Whether we want to admit it or not, this is how the world often works. At a glance, either someone attracts your attention or they don't. The funny part is you could swipe right all day and never actually make a connection. For a this to happen, the person on the other side of that picture you just swiped right has to do the same to you. When that happens.....
You have a match!!!
Now what? Well, it's time to engage in conversation. I love conversation so this is wonderful right? Sometimes, it is all it is cracked up to be. Cool conversations with new people! More often than not, though, my time would have been better spent chatting with the cat that I no longer have (No details on that shit. Still healing). It’s just that some people don't even deserve to be compared with a box of rocks, I swear!!! From time to time, you engage in a decent conversation and may even decide to take it offline and talk on the phone or, (yep, you guessed it), meet in person!
Yes, I'll admit. I've met a few “Tinders.” I've had some dates, some coffee and some hookups. I've been stood up twice, I met a loony bird and a Wackadoo, both in the same week. Tinder has sponsored numerous first dates but it has also been the reason why those firsts never turn into seconds. Still, I can say this and I mean it: I have met a couple of fucking amazing people on Tinder who are now true friends whom I genuinely love and cherish. And...YES: a few people I hope never to see again in life and a few that I hope will be around for a long time to come.
Tinder simply provides a platform for people to speed up the processes that happen in real-life. This can be good, but it can also be a trap. Because at the end of the day, you still have to interact with them on a very human/non-technological way. You must find out what they want, decide whether or not those things line up with your wants and then determine where to go from there. Keep in mind, the real world ain't so "Tinder!" Folks aren’t exactly honest and not everyone means you any good. The same is true when you use the app. So swipe left or swipe right. Meet up, hook up, match up! Whatever you do, keep in mind that you are reacting to and interacting with real, live human beings.
In my "Tinder" moments, I was not looking for a soulmate or a life partner and I made that pretty clear from the start. And while the chances are pretty damn slim that Tinder would be the place where a real love connection would occur, you never know, right? So while you're swiping away, ALWAYS swipe right to this:
Love them as they are, have amazing sex and communicate with intention.